somewhat slightly dazed

[dream_labyrinth]

The administration of the armed forces takes long to get going, but once they start, they are impressively quick.
About a week ago I was told it could be another four weeks before my application can be further processed.
Then last week I got the security papers to fill out, with no other information to it.
This morning, I got a call from the medical center around here, telling me they want to have me in this week for the medical. And even though they don't know more than I do, the lady I talked with seemed to think that I am going to start in October. As in October 2004, which is next week!
What is going on there?
I still don't have a contract, I don't have an apartment, I have never seen the place I am going to work at, provided I am going to work there, which I still don't know for sure.
You'd think they don't go through all this paperwork for no reason, but I am not going to say I have the job before I sign something.

I have to admit that the whole thing scares me a little. It's all going really quick now, and doesn't leave me time to think.
Which is good, probably, as I am starting to seriously doubt my ability to do this job.
I'm going to be pretty much on my own there, most likely not even my predecessor around to help me get used to it. It is a job I have never done before, I will have to do everything from selecting and buying stuff, cataloging, working at the desk to researches in data bases.
I keep telling myself they wouldn't give me the job if they didn't think I could do it, and that there is paperwork I can work from, and there is, as far as I know, a second employee to work with.
I'm going to be the boss of somebody! If that isn't scarier than the rest!

It will probably all work out fine in the end, and I will find that there is no need to worry, but right now that doesn't help much.
And it isn't only the job, there is all the other stuff that goes with it.
I need to find an apartment, rent it, pay for it, get all my furniture, books and clothes down there, settle in, find myself a network of people, things to do. I am going to have my own insurance, my own pay from which to pay taxes, this is stuff I never have done before, and I never thought about much. Now it's all coming at once.
I feel like a silly little child.
Thousands, millions of people have done this before me, I suppose it's part of growing up. I just would have never thought it can be so scary.

Comments

[cleverusername2.livejournal.com]

You are going through what I was feeling last year. It is funny to see how alike the German army is to the American army, they don't give you very much information! I submitted my application for my internship in April of 2003 but it wasn't until August that I suddenly got a call from the personnel office saying that I had gotten the job and needed report to work in a matter of days.

I can sympathize with your feelings of uncertainty. Are you going to be the only libarian there? That must be intimidating! I also might be in the position of supervising people, and it scares me as well.

I wish you good luck, let me know more about the job when you have more imput.

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

I think I am the only librarian. There is a second person, but if that was somebody with the same qualification I'd think he or she would have applied for the head position.
Thanks, I can need a lot of luck. :-/
Funny, it really seems an army is an army, no matter what country, they're all the same.

[cleverusername2.livejournal.com]

We say here in america that the army has a "hurry up and wait" attitude. For instance, if they need to transfer you to another base they will be in a big hurry to load you onto a plane and hussle you over there but then you end up waiting for a few days as administrative problems are worked out.

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

Hurry up and wait!
Yeah, that's it!
*LOL*