Clear space on desk. Hit head on clear space. Repeat

[dream_labyrinth]

Today is a oh so special Wednesday. It's 3rd October!
Day of German Unity! Our national holiday. Marked by the complete absence of any parades, major shows or events. Trust the Germans to put their national holiday into a season where you can expect the weather to be dreary.

In the past years, I've taken this opportunity to write something insightful about German unity and how we still need to learn to live together.

I'm getting tired of it. I'm getting tired of all those people voting for the former SED in Eastern Germany. I'm getting tired of people like the military librarian who stood in the courtyard of the prison in Berlin Hohenschönhausen after talking to a person who had been imprisoned there for his political views and said she didn't really believe all those stories. I'm getting tired of people in Western Germany saying East Germany just costs them money and who needs them anyway? I'm getting tired of people forgetting that it was dangerous, it was a risk, to walk out into the streets with a candle in your hand and demanding free speech seventeen years ago.
What people in Eastern Germany did was the most amazing thing since - I don't think there ever was such an amazing thing. And they forgot. And everybody else forgot.
And it makes me want to hide in a hole and cry because we Germans are so much better than we give ourselves credit for, but if we don't see that, how can we blame others for not seeing it?


So I have been at home all day doing nothing. Oh, yes, I cleaned five pairs of shoes and two pairs of boots, I vacuumed the living room, the kitchen, the study, the bathroom and the hallway and I emtpied out the garbage. Apart from that, I read an Emilie Loring which was not on my to-read stack.

My exchange fic is stuck in first chapter with a draft that's stuck in the middle because I can't decide on one crucial point.

I feel lost, and not even looking at wet, half-naked men can cheer me up. I feel weak and ugly and unimportant and I hate hate hate to have days off because if I don't have a good reason to leave the flat it becomes all the more obvious that nobody comes to see me.

Comments

[altonwings.livejournal.com]

I don't think you'll ever see me on a page like that. However, if you *really* need pics of a wet, half-naked man, I guess I can load the camera...

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

*g*
I have pictures of wet, half-naked men. They don't seem to do me any good, though. All that happens is me thinking that Antonio Banderas really isn't all that attractive, actually.

[altonwings.livejournal.com]

So... you want pictures of wet all-naked men?

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

I'd do with a dry, clothed man if I could have him in person, actually. After all, if the mood strikes, the undressing and wetting part can be done here.

[foudebassan.livejournal.com]

*is somewhat sidetracked by that link*

*make it completely sidetracked*

*drool*

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

And I thought I was the one with the bad attention span.
Note to self: if you want to make depressive posts to get people to pity you, do not include links to half-naked, wet men.

[foudebassan.livejournal.com]

I have an extremely good, long attention span. I can watch wet, half-naked men for hours at an end without getting distracted, so there. :p

*gives you consoling pat in the back*

The next public holiday is Xmas and you'll get lots of presents then?

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

*sigh*
Don't mention Christmas. I just got my account statement and am trying to figure out how much money I will be able to save until next summer for that crazy trip to America, whether I should just ask for money for Christmas and how cheap I can go on Christmas presents for my overly large, expensive family this year.

[martianmooncrab.livejournal.com]

I remember the Wall going up, and was shocked that it came down in my lifetime.

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

I wish I had been older when the wall came down. I don't really have any memory of it myself. Go figure, something really historical happens to you and you're too young to even realise it.

[martianmooncrab.livejournal.com]

I had gone over to the OPCON to deliver some msgs to the Watch Officer, and saw the Wall coming down on CNN, and made the comment that there went our job security (being in the military and all)

We process History personally, I can remember the JFK Assassination, mostly because we got sent home from school and my stoic German-Prussian grandmother was crying. Thats not something I saw all that often.

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

Your mother is German? Where from?

I remember on 9/11 I was working in a library where we had no radio or TV, and when I came home and my brother told me the twin towers had crashed, I first thought it was an earth quake,
I also, even though I am ashamed to admit it, hoped they would stop repeating the same little news they had on it over and over again and return to the regular tv programme, I think there was Ally McBeal I wanted to watch or something. I claim it was a stress reaction.

[shiv5468.livejournal.com]

HUmans are trivial creatures.. witness high minds being distracted by wet, naked men.

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

Not you, too!?

*sigh*

And I thought men were easy to manipulate.

[shiv5468.livejournal.com]

INdeed not, I didn't even look. I was referring to Foudebassan.

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

Sure. You didn't even look.

[jonthedull.livejournal.com]

How can people forget so fast? Why dop they want to pretend it did'nt happen?

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

Oh, they like to think only of the good stuff. And of course, especially if you were a civil servant in the GDR, you'd rather pretend you weren't working for a regime that went against at least half the human rights. It's much easier to live with yourself if you can think of yourself as the sort of person who wouldn't work for people like that, isn't it?

As for reunification, they don't exactly want to forget, they just don't think it matters much and after all, this whole business caused so much trouble it wasn't really worth it, was it?

[knight0fswords.livejournal.com]

I remember when the wall came down. I remember turning on the television and watching, then falling to my knees in front of the TV and crying tears of joy. I haven't forgotten those images. I still see them in my mind.

Okay. Now, why are you feeling weak and ugly and unimportant? I think of you as a strong woman. I've seen your picture and think you've lovely. I would love to have your hair! And you're important to me. I can't wait to get to meet you at Portus! Since so many of us are sharing the rooms (and beds), I'll even sleep with you, if that will make you feel better! ~eyebrow wriggle~

[knight0fswords.livejournal.com]

Oh, and the half-naked men are definitely bookmarked!

I was somewhat disappointed, however, that there was no Morgan Freeman (http://pics.livejournal.com/knight0fswords/pic/0002y3xz), Michael Wincott (http://pics.livejournal.com/knight0fswords/pic/0002zesz) (Tell me that's not Snape!), or Gabriel Byrne (http://pics.livejournal.com/knight0fswords/pic/0003048x).

I guess they couldn't find pics of them with water.

[shiv5468.livejournal.com]

That's not Snape

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

Not bad, but I'll have to agree with Shiv: That's not Snape. I don't think Rickman's too old. After all, Snape has lived a kind of life that is bound to make him look older than he is.

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

:-)
I'm so looking forward to Portus! And there's no turning back now, I just got the credit card statement - the money's gone, I'm definitely on.
If by that time I have recovered enough from getting new clothes for winter (I need new shoes - *wail*) adn giving Christmas presents and keeping healthy eating habits and OMG I can't believe I'm spending so much.
At the moment, I am really wibbly whether I will be able to afford it.


*L* I don't think we'll get much sleep, then! Which probably is a good thing for you, as I am told (by my sister) that I am a restless sleeper. That's probably due to the fact that she's never forgiven me for kicking her out of the bed we shared for a few nights about fifteen years ago.

[annie-from-aust.livejournal.com]

I hope your day improves.
It was a great thing when the wall came down. I went through East Germany from Scandanavia to Berlin in 1982 and it was scarey. Armed Guards with dogs came on the train to check your passport. People only speaking German. Suspicious stares from the unhappy looking population. When I got out to the West I was one relieved lady !

[dream-labyrinth.livejournal.com]

Not always, but sometimes I drive across where the border used to be and try to imagine how it might have been back then. It's hard, because the area is so much in the middle of Germany it's difficult to see it as a border. It really makes you understand how wrong the separation was