Random thoughts

I have the same reaction when I wake up to no comment emails ;)

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No-comment-email-haters of the world, unite! *ggg*

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*lol*!

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angharad.livejournal.com

Clearly, this sort of thread is the solution! Wheee!

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Yeah, we're really discussing that matter in depth.
But it's fun and sometimes you just need to do things only for fun.

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angharad.livejournal.com

I'm not sure I'm kidding, though. Sometimes, a lot of silly emails is just the thing you need.

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Now I'm not sure whether I should answer or not.
But anyway,

wolflady26 and

agrathea and me have had quite a discussion on this, so I'm not going to repeat everything.
I just wanted to say what I felt about not getting a lot of comments. So now I've learned a bit more about other people's perception of the purpose of LJ, which is great. I can understand that receiving emails with no content at all can be annoying if you are busy and have a lot on your mind. But then, nobody can influence the mood other people on LJ are in at one point. So everybody has to decide for him/herself not to read a "reply to your post" email if they don't feel like it or have other things to do, even if that means they might miss out on something important. But you can just leave that email in your inbox, it won't go away and it won't yell at you for not reading it for a week...

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Hmm, I'm usually pretty busy on the weekend. I rarely even have time to write in my own journal. I try to answer comments on Monday mornings, but I do so more out of courtesy than actually having the time.

I think I also see my journal a bit differently... I post in there for myself. Sure, I like to hear what people have to say and am thankful for comments (and try to show I am by responding when I do have the time), but I don't see it as my friends responsibility to comment in my journal on a regular basis. I think if I made them feel like they had to do so, they would feel a lot less inclined to do it at all. To me, a journal is a place where I record things that happen so I can look back on them later. Yes, I am addicted to my e-mail and LJ, I love comments when they happen, but when I don't get them it doesn't take all the value out of the experience for me.

I wish I could say I was sorry, but it would only stress me out to think of posting comments in journals as a required use of my time each weekend, especially when I am already doing as well as I can to juggle everything else I have going on.

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I don't think of it as a requirement. It's more that I feel disappointed in myself that I haven't written anything worth talking about.

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I definitely don't think you should take it that way. Considering the size of most people's friends lists, it just gets really cumbersome to comment on all the entries people would like, especially when they are pretty busy.

Also, most of the friends on my friends list are people I actually know that are too far away to keep up with, and LJ lets me read up on them to see what they're doing. Just because I can't comment doesn't mean I don't care or think what they have to say is interesting.

Perhaps at the core of the discussion is just a basic questioning of what LJ is about. For some people it is just a journal, but for others, it is sort of empty without more of a community aspect. So when I don't comment on some people's journals, it is a slight or an unintended commentary on the worth of their post for comment. While in my mind, not commenting means nothing but the fact that I don't have the time or energy to comment at the moment.

I can understand why some might take away from the situation negative feelings, but I can't worry whether about others taking umbrage from my own behaviors, especially when my own lack of comments has nothing to do with the other person at all.

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I think I might have sounded more negative than I meant.

I have a fairly large number of people reading me, so there aren't all that many posts where noone says anything at all. If I get no comments, I kind of get that "Hello, is this mike on?" feeling.

I don't feel bad, or any resentment, if any particular person doesn't post, and I surely don't comment on every one of my friends' posts (I would never be able to do anything else if I tried that!). But I do feel happy when I get a comment, because that means that there is some interaction going on.

The people on LJ that I feel closest to are the ones that I chat with through comments, both on my LJ and on theirs. Not necessarily every post, not necessarily every day even, but occasionally.

To be specific, I don't have a feeling that you and I don't interact. I mean, here we are right now :D And we've chatted about other things in the past as well, and I'm quite happy with that.

There are a couple of people that I don't feel particularly close to. When I read their writings, I'm not motivated to comment, and rarely get a comment from them.

I do use my journal differently from most other writers, in that I don't have any real life friends on my flist. I read only one person that I've ever _met_ in RL, and that was an old friend that I hadn't spoken to for years before finding on LJ. So the vast majority of my communication is through comments.

I'm rambling. I'm going to stop. Simple summary: I like getting comments, but don't feel like LJ has no meaning if I don't, and would hate the thought that anyone would feel pressured to leave comments if they're not motivated to by what I write. :)

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Hahah! Thanks for clarifying. I'm glad to know you wouldn't have taken offense to my silent spells. It is kind of good to know different people's feelings on posting, it kind of gives me pause to think about how I feel about it, as well.

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I actually get the feeling that something good came from my whiny little post. That's great. We need to know how differently we feel about these things to make sure we're not offended when no offense is intended.

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I agree with what you say in your summary. I, too, have no real life friends on my LJ friends list. I know one RL friend who reads my posts, but all others I can only get in contact with through LJ. So reading their posts and getting comments from them is the subsitute for regular communication with them.

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I'm OK with that, but I think it's good that my little post started this discussion, because it helps other people understand why or why not they receive comments. If you say you read my journal, I know that you do, even if you don't comment. But there is really no way of being sure, is there?

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Yes, I agree, some good did come of it.

Certainly there is no way of being sure, but then I would hope you could trust my word. I find it interesting that it matters so much to you... If I am the type of person who would lie about such a thing, perhaps I am not worth the concern?

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Oww. No, I didn't mean it that way.
Actually, I do believe that you read my Journal even if you don't comment. The "can't be sure" part was meant in a more general way.

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Oh, okay! Sorry I misunderstood. :)

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No problem. I didn't really make myself clear enough, so it wasn't any wonder that you understood it the way you did...

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Thank you. It wasn't meant as a requirement. It was merely a way of voicing my bad mood.
And you're right, it gives the impression that one didn't write anything interesting. Which is sad, as I often think a lot about what I want to write. Sometimes, when something funny or moving happens, I go like "How can I put that in a post on LJ?"
So it is dissapointing that nobody else seems to find that same situation funny or moving.

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*sigh* You know what? That makes a lot of sense to me. So now I have something to think about for a while.
Some of my posts are for myself, and then I don't mind getting no feedback. But if I sit around and have nothing to do, no work to occupy my mind and a way too much time, reading other people's opinions on what I write is a good way of knowing that my existence matters. I get all whiny when I'm bored, and when I'm in that "nobody cares whether I'm here or not" mood, it's great to find out that there are people interested in what I say.
I like your comments, because they show that you really think about what I write, and try to help me. That's much better than just "I read your post" comments. So I'll be happy with every comment I get from you. Don't change your style just because I'm in a bad mood. Especially as I know very well that you have a lot of other things to do...

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