Ouch

May. 9th, 2006 01:17 pm
The nice kid came in today and asked me whether I actually really wanted to go out with him, because if I didn't, he wouldn't jump from the nearest building if I told him no.
So I did.

Because. I actually do not want to go out with him, and the fact he's dead serious about the whole thing doesn't make it one bit easier.

So now I don't have to worry about going out with him, but I feel guilty for telling him no.

And I had a headache before, that's worse now.

Tonight I will have a first fencing lesson. Which is nice, really.

The problem is, if I don't get to spend enough time alone, I get cranky. ([livejournal.com profile] wolflady26 likely was subjected to this the past weekend...) Despite the fact that I can talk your ear off when I'm in a chatty mood, I prefer to be alone quite often (alone in the sense of not being talked to and having no demands on my time and thought than whatever I decide on myself). So instead of going fencing today, I'd rather hide in my room and ignore the rest of the world.
And tomorrow evening there's sports, and I should go there because not doing any sports for weeks will take revenge by making my back hurt like hell pretty soon.
I also promised to go to choir on Thursday, so again no rest for me, and on Friday I'll drive home.

Gosh, to think people tell me I shouldn't sit around in my room so much - I barely get around to do that!

I believe my headache is a migraine.
So.
Christoph ruined what could have been a good night's sleep, and I wasn't in the best of moods this morning.
I had basically decided last night to not date him, because it would be just a waste of time and money for both of us if I don't even consider actually going steady.

And then today was like hell at work. The computer guys in Bonn kept shutting down our server, calling me to tell me to close all sessions I was working with. Then they were done, but I two of my sessions hung themselves up. So I called them to kill those dialogues, and they did, but so well that I couldn't connect again. I think I managed to catalogue about two books all day. Just great.
Especially if you want to check out books and can't because you can't use the check-out software.

Then my predecessor was annoying as usual and called me for no other reason than getting on my nerves, and the person doing the proof-read for the school history had marked a lot of things that weren't wrong, she just thought it'd be nicer if done differently. Sod off, b****, you could have done it from the start if you're so smart!

So yeah, I'm in a really good mood.
And I still don't know what to do about Christoph. And I want some decision to be made before Maximilian comes back from vacation because I won't go flirting with Maximilian if I'm dating Christoph, but I'd rather flirt with Maximilian than date Christoph.

Somebody sings that men are like shoes*. So wrong! Did your shoes ever demand you only wear one pair? Or did your shoes ever ask you to spend the rest of your life with them? Or do your shoes pull you away from the windows of a shoe store so you can't look for another?

Bugger.

* I believe it's Shania Twain, but I don't feel like looking it up.

Arrghhh!

Apr. 11th, 2006 12:45 pm
Okay.
This morning, one of the sergeants asked me whether I wasn't annoyed at all the guys hitting on me all the time. Which was kind of a funny question to ask, imo, but anyway.
So I told him no, because for me it's actually quite a bit of fun.

Well.
Christoph left just now. He works in the same department as me and he just broke up with his girlfriend and he told me before that he'd like to go out with me sometime.
Now he came in to tell me he doesn't eat or sleep much and thinks of me when he wakes up and when he goes to bed and the whole shebang.
And how he wants to be with me and would I be willing to try?

The thing is, I like him. Just not - like that. He's a really nice kid and stuff, but there's no spark, no butterflies.

I told him we could go out and see what happens. I don't think it will, but I really don't want to hurt him, so I don't know whether it was a good move to say yes. Maybe I should have told him off right away.

And I couldn't even tell him why I don't want to be with him. I just - don't, really.

And then there's Maximilian. I'm kind of curious where that will lead but I can't really go flirting with other guys if I'm with somebody. (Or I could, but I wouldn't.)

Nice, and now I'm supposed to work well for the rest of the day with that to think about.


You see the trouble with you
There's no trouble with you
So when you say that you love me
That stops me loving you
I don't care if it's the sun, I want it off.

Well. I ended up not going to the doctor. Katrin had invited some people over for lunch at her new place and I got talked into going. She had made a really hot and spicy soup which helped my cold, though. But my eyes are still really sensitive to the light, which sucks.

When I came back from Katrin's it was really crazy up here for a while. People coming in to check out stuff like there's no tomorrow. (And let me just point out: The rooms in Katrin's new apartment can't be more than 2 metres high. I'm not tall, but I can effing touch the ceiling. How can you possibly live in a place where a tall person can't even walk through the door upright?)
And Maximilian came by and we chatted a bit and he now has my cell phone number and said we should really go out for a drink or something after work sometime. *bg*
Gosh, I'm horrible. Really. I mean, shouldn't I be - I don't know - sitting here waiting for Mr Right or go for some nice kid instead of a man who's quite a bit older? Well, as I can't even write about "some nice kid" without it making my toes curl in disgust, probably not. And I've done way enough waiting before I started working here and that just got me to the guy who didn't understand the meaning of the word NO.

At some point, I need to talk about M. Not Maximilian, another M. Lo and behold, I am getting almost discrete all of a sudden! That's because this M is American and that increases the chances of somebody knowing him. I met him when I was 17, but he's married now and has at least one kid. But he deserves his own entry, so that's gotta wait.

I think we got something like 6 bills today for the library. Gosh, we're spending money we don't even have yet!

Oh, and another thing: Current Location??? Do you think I am going to write "at work"?????
Life is odd.

First, long, long ago, there was Nico.

And around that time there was Marco who doesn't seem to have made it into any decent entry that I could find.

Then there was Sebastian. And John the bagpiper.

Then Tobias

And currently, there is Maximilian. He's one of the law teachers / law advisors here on the base and he's really funny and looks good and whatnot. And we've been writing emails back and forth for a while and I was at his office Wednesday (strictly official) and we talked for like three hours about all kinds of things.

And we'll see...
Work: stuck in 2001 - apparently, the digital pictures we had of this time were deleted. Some of them are stored in the CDs with the 2002 pictures, which means going through six CDs of pictures with names as DSCN000435 to find some that were made in 2001. (Did you expect there would be a list of events for the pictures or anything????)

Laptop: not going to be here for the next four weeks as my coworker is doing a course and isn't here. But I am going to get the latest model of that laptop for the same price!

Car: I sent the money for the Carisma. The Lancer didn't want to play very well on Saturday. Going to take it on a tour today so it won't get bored, then it'll hopefully bring me home Friday.

Social life: Tobias is annoyed at me not going out with him. I went with Alexandra (she's the French and Spanish translator for the school) to watch the Geisha movie on Saturday and then we sat up at her place until 4 or so and talked. It seems I can't stop myself from telling the rape story to all kinds of people.
Also, I am working on my cross-stitch picture a lot, which is not a social activity.
Alexandra knows Labyrinth. She therefore is the only German I know who knew of that movie without me telling them.

Health: having a bit of a cold and an annoying headache for days. And the blood pressure is not really on a good working level, but then it never is.

Weather: today mixture of snow and sun. Supposed to start snowing again tomorrow and rain Thursday and Friday. This is going to suck, car-wise.

Friday is my birthday.

Urgh

Feb. 28th, 2006 05:03 pm
My roses are gone, there's only chocolate left from Valentine's Day. :-(

Driving down to Hammelburg this morning (I only had to be at work at 1 p.m.), the Lancer did alright for about three hours. The last half hour was annoying. This car sucks!
I can't wait for the tenth, the Carisma can't possibly be any worse!
Though of course it's my own fault, I neglected the Lancer and was mean to him over the weekend because I was concerned too much about buying a new car. Cars, just like computers, have souls, and they are easily hurt.

My left eye hurts.

Tonight, I'm going to go watch Nanny McPhee with Katrin.

Tobias (aka Jacket Guy, aka the guy with the kid and girlfriend) texted me yesterday night to tell me his girlfriend gave him absolution for future sins.
Just great, just when things were simply and easy for a change. Now I have to go back deciding whether I want or don't want to let our relation progress into whatever direction this might be going to. Part of me wonders whether I'd miss something if I didn't go for it, but mainly - he has somewhat lost the attraction to me. He's still a nice guy and all that, but the spark is missing.

And another guy I've been jokingly flirting with - in that way that tends to be the regular tone in conversations between males and females around here - has just split up with his girlfriend and I know that some of my coworkers would think it a good idea if we got together. But even though he's a nice kid, he's a bit younger and as stuck up as this may sound, no real intellectual match for me.
I just hope the coworkers will keep from commenting too much.

So there you have it, the Queen of Randomness has spoken.

Arghh!

Feb. 17th, 2006 08:38 pm
Well. So yesterday I went shopping by car. Drove back up to the base and the car was acting up a bit again. Oh well, nothing out of the ordinary. So I unpacked at my home and then wanted to drive to my parking space. Unfortunately, as I was going round a corner, the engine died. So I was sitting right there in the middle of the road (fortunately, a little used road on the base), and couldn't go anywhere. Waited a few minutes, then started again and made it at least off the road.
Went to choir and to the last get-together of the infantry bataillon here before they're going to be disbanded (voc?).
Then the car did start again and I could drive to my parking space without problem. Today I took the car to Schweinfurt to a Mitsubishi dealer and told them what the problem was. And lo and behold, finally somebody at least knows what I am talking about. The guy said his father had had the same problem, and it was the distributor (could that be right? He showed me, it's the thing right next to the oil tank thingie. Yuck, I have so absolutely no idea about engines...)
Anyway, they can't test whether it's damaged there, they'd have to send it in which would take about a week to get back, and if it does get repaired, it'll be 250 Euros.
Yeah, sure.
So the plan is the following: I will drive this car this week and next (sorry, [livejournal.com profile] linnapaw, we'll just have to hope for the best on Sunday and Monday), drive home with it and there it will STAY.
I'll sell it, I'm sick of it. I don't care whether Dad wants me to keep it until the next inspection is due. I am going to get myself a decent used car, which I can afford right now, and I currently have more money available than this car did cost when we bought it.
And then I will finally have a car again that is reliable. High time, too. The guys at Mitsubishi said I could either go for the repair work or drive the car as long as it'll go. So it isn't as if it's something life threatening, just really annoying. So I am pretty sure I will make it through another 10 days, and then we're done.
Funny how things suddenly work out.

In other news, Marco has been visiting. The guy I met way back when I started here and with whom I'd watch CSI every Monday night until he left the army last summer. Was nice to see him again.

stuff I noticed about myself )

[livejournal.com profile] wolflady26, I owe you an email. But there's been so much going on I simply had no time to really muster the concentration. I think you got a great idea there, we'll just have to decide on a weekend. And I might come by train... :-/
Well.
Yesterday, when I left the library, I told Tobias that even though Punxsutawney* Phil said it would continue to be winter, it started feeling like spring.
Now if I say something like that, I expect a blank look as an answer. Instead, he said "then I guess it's time for somebody to kill the damn groundhog.
Me: WTF??? Don't tell me you know what I'm talking about!
Turned out he loves the movie and has watched it tons of times. Hee.

Also, this morning it was quite spring-like, even though it's drizzling a bit now.

And besides Tobias, there is another guy, Mr A. in the library right now with whom I joke around a lot. Life is good.

Got some more stuff incorporated into the text, the end is closer still. But I'm at the desk now as Katrin got this afternoon off, so no time for school history as long as there are people coming in all the time. Which is good. Back when I started working, we had times when nobody came in all day, that rarely happens these days.

Still, the library needs a real make-over before it can be as attractive as I think it should be and is possible.

Somebody sent me the pictures of the caricatures that are the grounds for the massive demonstrations, attacking of embassies and burning of flags in Arabian countries right now. And you know what - they're lame.
They aren't even funny, they're not very pointed, they're simply lame. And they are not nearly as evil as you'd expect with this sort of reaction. I mean, come on! Who cares what is in yesterday's newspaper? Nothing is as outdated as yesterday's news, and there really is no need to get so worked up about that caricature. Do we want to dig out caricatures that have been made about God, or Buddha, or any religion in the world? I am understanding, but there really is a limit to people's sensibilities.
People are effing dying because of those silly drawings. They're attacking ISAF-camps now. That's just crazy.

Anyway - let's not go into politics.
I'm having too much fun right now to let me get down because the world's gone crazy.

Mr A. just left - he's so much fun. And I swear he is slowly making his way towards asking me out. Tehee. I tell you, none of my old schoolmates would believe me if I told them that any guy would ask me out, or even talk with me for longer than absolutely necessary. But then I am not quite the person I was back in school anymore.


* I refuse to look up the spelling of that silly creature's name, but you know whom I mean.

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